It Makes Fools of Us All

When I die, I want my ashes to be made into projectiles. Like guerrilla gardening seed bombs. Just a pinch of me in a bundle with the seeds from big, hearty, colorful flowers. Maybe some glitter. Wrapped in tulle bags like the ones they throw at weddings. I don't know who I could ask to do that for... Continue Reading →

Featured post

Thank You.

I was angry when I wrote this Forgive me if it goes astray... 😉 ******************* Thank you for showing me what your face actually looks like when you peel back the skin - the carefully applied camouflage and strategic shading revealing something burnt and diseased and decayed, the fascia tearing like a bandage being ripped from an... Continue Reading →

Featured post

Halloween Street

It wasn't our last Halloween as parents of trick or treaters. But it was close. The first Halloween I was a parent, my son was six weeks old and helpless to resist. I dressed up, and I bought a ton of candy, and I decorated the porch. No one else did. The doorbell rang eight... Continue Reading →

Featured post

The Fun Part’s Over

I had lunch with my mom today. For those of who are unfamiliar with what that is like, try this: Go put on your favorite outfit, one in which you look your best, or are the most comfortable. It doesn't matter what it is, the point is to feel as good about yourself as possible. Sit down, pour yourself some... Continue Reading →

Featured post

Why Is This Cow Smiling?

As you are reading this, I am probably standing at the south end of a northbound cow made entirely of butter, surrounded by a bunch of teenagers made of....teenagers, using my new hella rap skills to bridge the generational gap. That's how I picture it, anyway. I volunteered to chaperone my son's 7th grade trip to the... Continue Reading →

Featured post

We Know Why You Were Late

(sifting through stuff in my drafts folder) My punctuality-impaired friend - we are on to you. We know that you aren't a bad person. Children don't always cooperate. Traffic is sometimes terrible. Flat tires, weather, locusts - yes, sometimes it isn't your fault. But sometimes, it just is. Like when the birthday party/baby shower/wedding has already... Continue Reading →

Featured post

Blog at

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: